Maybe you can come around to my point of view. Nowadays, it appears that fewer men are getting married than in the 1990s. It appears that the problem is global. Many men are getting divorced rather than getting married. What prevents men from getting married way they used to decades ago? Men may put in a lot of effort and make elaborate preparations for marriage out of a desperate desire to have a bride. What changed, and why? How unexpected is that?
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A recent online debate made me think. The idea at the center of it was that "smart men don't get married." Why is it thought to be sensible not to desire to be married? Of course, there are advantages to marriage. It assists in maintaining order and stability for a man. But if the issue of separation comes, these same advantages can turn into catastrophe.
Reasons why Men Don’t Want To Get Married Anymore
According to a recent Pew Research Centre research, around 4 in 10 persons between the ages of 25 and 54 were single or cohabitating in 2019. Since 1990, the numbers have increased by 29%. This raises the issue of why people nowadays, particularly men, decide against getting married.
Many marriage-minded women and society at large are confused by the fact that males no longer desire to get married. So why do men defy marriage, exactly?
1. Marrying is a scam brought by religion
Is marriage a scam? I believe I have previously talked about this a few times. The concept of marriage as a whole is conventional. It was initially motivated by religious reasons. Additionally, it was built on a patriarchal framework with an unequal distribution of labor between men and women.
It was long believed to be the remedy for loneliness. If you calm down, you'll feel better. But rather than getting married and making your spouse miserable, if you're depressed and lonely, you should seek treatment.
Additionally, marriage is not ideal in the current economic climate. Marriage has become less and less appealing to many individuals because it helps split the costs of living and raising children, but many people choose not to have children in the first place.
2. Government complicates marriage process
No amount of official documentation can demonstrate your devotion to or love for your companion. This is especially important considering that if you decide to divorce, this paperwork could become a liability.
It only makes sense not to get married to many people these days, with everyone taking the concept of "one true love" with a grain of salt.
3. Fear of Becoming a Provider
Despite progress in gender equality, many men continue to experience pressure from society to take up the role of the relationship's provider. Many people are finding it difficult to support themselves alone because of the global economic crisis. So, it might be a bit of a nightmare to think about supporting a wife and future children.
Many people opt to live in shared apartments since they cannot afford homes. Almost invariably, having a family would imply attempting to acquire a home, which may mean adding a mortgage and endless amounts of debt to these people's lives.
Read also: 12 signs of a gold digger
4. 50-50 Syndrome
Things have gotten worse since gender fairness was introduced. The emergence of gender equity appears to be a major factor in men's reluctance to settle down and get married. Initially, patriarchal norms guided the creation of marriage. Therefore, the breadwinner and provider would be the man of the house. On the other side, the woman would handle all household duties, including cooking, cleaning, and child care.
Women's duties were constructed to be ones of service, and as a result, they occupied a lesser position in the resulting power structure. In such a case, the male would be the sole decision-maker. Undoubtedly, times are changing.
Nowadays, we see marriage as a joint venture, a 50-50 arrangement. Therefore, all responsibilities—from providing for one's family to doing chores—must be shared equally. Many guys now steer clear of marriage as a result of this. They do not view the agreement as fair to them, but rather as unfair.
5. Marriage restricts Social Life
The time is again limited. There may not be much time left for you when you already have a family, a job, and other commitments.
Does this imply that the Fridays you spend drinking beer and watching football with the guys are no longer valid? Yes, those will be uncommon, especially if children are involved. You could assign your partner complete control over managing the family, but what sort of partner would it make you?
6. Courts always favor women on divorce matters.
Nearly 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. This leads many people to wonder why marriage even exists.
If the marriage should end, you would be faced with a protracted legal struggle that would constantly deplete your finances. According to others, being married just seems like a recipe for future financial and emotional hardship.
7. Men don't Feel lonely anymore
The use of dating apps has ensured that. The loneliness of a Saturday night can be banished with just one right swipe on Tinder. And all of that without any obligation. Additionally, the idea of "friends-with-benefits" is spreading.
Without completing a single piece of paper, these connections can satisfy all of your physical and emotional demands. Thus, on Monday. With nothing to stop you, you can still feel rejuvenated and ready to resume pursuing a rewarding profession.
8. Wedding is just too expensive
Do you really want to go into debt in order to throw an expensive party that would need months of stressful planning? For what purpose? The consent of the government? You can love your sweetheart and be with them for a lifetime without spending a single cent on a pointless extravaganza. You have seen or heard how expensive wedding parties are. People go into credits that later leave them depressed and broke
9. Miss right Is not yet Born.
I hold the entire rom-com subgenre responsible for this. An entire generation or two have had the concept of "the right one" and the flimsy "one true love" pounded into their heads. Therefore, a lot of people delay getting married in order to wait for the person who is truly intended for them. However, the concept itself is somewhat absurd.
Relationships require a lot of work, whether they are romantic or not. I concur with the adage that soulmates don't just happen. They come into being. It requires dedication. It requires your daily decision to stay.
In any case, some people still have ruby-tinted glasses and believe that one day they will meet someone who will ignite their souls simply by entering a room. Therefore, until they have discovered this fabled creature of a soulmate, these men do not want to get married.
10. Need To Concentrate on profession
The goal of society is not merely for you to wed. Additionally, it has given the entire scenario a sense of urgency. Therefore, males feel under pressure to organize their lives and occupations before turning 35 in order to get married "in time." Naturally, this usually doesn't look good for their jobs.
Men who are married must divide their time between their families and jobs. So, stop working overtime and doing all-nighters to earn more money while vying for a promotion. Already, time is a finite resource.
At what age should a man get married?
Age shouldn't and doesn't matter in this situation, in my opinion. Some people find it more comfortable to wait until they are older to be married because their money and occupations are more established by that time. As a result, a man in his 35s (or someone older) may feel that they've accomplished everything they set out to do and want to settle down.
Why do some men get married?
When someone believes they have found their soul match, they may desire to get married. Others might wed because it makes good financial and legal sense. Others could still follow religious tenets and desire marriage in order to "finally settle down" and begin a family.
Characteristics that shows a man wont marry in his life.
They enjoy being alone and don't want to disturb that feeling. Or they question the wisdom of spending so much money on a party. They might already know the person they want to spend the rest of their life with, and they don't feel the need to file legal documents to declare their love for them.
What are benefits of marrying?
There are benefits to getting married as a man, despite the longer paragraphs you just read explaining why men no longer get married.
Some of the benefits include:
A. Less Drama
You are aware of what I'm referring to. Any woman or girl can approach you, especially if they are aware of your financial stability, and try to wreck your life by tricking you into thinking you would marry her. They make certain to become pregnant for you and submit a child support application.
Even married men experience these dramas, but single men account for more than 80% of them. Many ladies or girls respect you when you're married and can't just come off as easily as they may when you're single. Single men frequently have multiple affairs with different women in a week, which puts them at danger for illnesses and other problems that could wreck their entire life. Fighting other men for the girl imagine all that.
B. High chances of succeeding.
It is likely that you will be motivated to work harder for achievement because you are a provider for your family. Some wives are supportive of their husbands, which might help you and your family succeed in life. One of the main elements that have propelled many guys to where they are now is their responsibility. You can leave your wife running business while you are employed. Such partnership can improve your income.
C. Respect and Esteem
Imagine in-laws and your wife together with other people praising you for the good things you are doing for the family. You automatically feel important. Praises are a good mental factors that can boost your health. You don't need to check on everything alone your wife is available to help.
Photo By Je Phiri:
Summary.
Today, many people are reluctant to get married due to various reasons. they grew up seeing relationships fall apart in front of their eyes, expense requirement, emotional trauma that comes with divorces and many more issues. People have been getting married for millennia, thinking it will fix everything. However, it didn't. Living together with people who have unresolved difficulties does not make for a happy home.
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